Tuesday, December 15, 2015


Three-quarters of our Elite 8 have been decided, and other than Scrooged somehow losing to The Santa Clause in the 1st Round, our biggest, and most disappointing upset has taken place: Love Actually - unarguably a Top 3 holiday film in my personal opinion - gets bounced by Phoebe Cates and some furry little critters that turn into monsters if you get them wet or feed them after midnight.

Disappointing doesn't even begin to describe how I'm feeling. This is right up there with the afternoon I spent just walking the streets of North Baldwin because my 13-year old brain couldn't comprehend that David Volek had just doubled down on the infinite pain Francisco Cabrerea had caused me six months earlier.

It's not often 13-year old kids go on a walkabout to clear their minds. Typically, if you're not living in a one bedroom apartment with your grandmother, you find salvation in video games or the nudie mags you'd stolen from the stash you and your cousin found in your uncle's office. But Gram is home, and she just doesn't get it, and you literally have to just walk. I think I may have even stopped at St. Wendelin's and lit a candle for my future sports fandom, that's how rough a state I was in.

So, when you guys vote Gremlins a better holiday movie than Love Actually, you damn near put me in walkabout mode. I want you to know that.

Now that my inner pain has been released, we can move on to what now measures up to be a hell of a battle in the 80s/90s bracket:

80s/90s genre: (1) National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation vs. (5) The Santa Clause

If I have to sit and explain the merits of Christmas Vacation to you, then you're a lost soul who shouldn't be viewing this but instead should be out on a walkabout of your own, searching for the meaning of life. It is hands down the #1 overall seed in this tournament, and I've already begun allowing my 6-year old daughter to watch it - and not the chintzy, ABC Family version, either - to correctly set a baseline for all future sense of humor. (She cracks fart jokes regularly, so I know something's working, by the way.)

Click on the graphic above to vote Tim 'The Tool Man' out of this thing, if even a round too late. Also, you can take a look at our up-to-date brackets below.


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